3 randoms

1. You know those commercials for careerbuilder that show the guy who works in an office with only monkeys? The thrust of their message is "this guy wants a new job." But guess what? That message doesn't work on me. Because I would LOVE to work in an office with only monkeys. Are you kidding me? Jumping on bubble wrap? Playing with our food? The possibilities fill me with a deep and powerful joy.

2. This morning on the subway, I was so rude as to unabashedly invade the private reading space of pure Royalty. You see, on the crowded L train, the center aisle is designated specifically for men to hold their books in. Once having found his seat, or "perch," it is a noble man's prerogative to lean forward and rest his cavalier arms upon his knees. And then to not move. No matter what. When the doors opened and masses of passengers pressed me unwillingly towards the gentlemen's giant bubble, I was unable to hold the levee. And, without my knowledge, the tip of my bag passed in front of (without touching) the top two sentences of his precious text. Without looking up, he took my bag in his hand and pressed it firmly away from his personal study lounge. I blushed at my own audacity. Oh yeah, and the precious text? I was able to glance at the chapter title and it was about witches. Witches. If you're going to be a crazy asshole, at least try not to be such a dorky one. Dorkface.

3. My friend is one of those spellers who uses the age old trick "when in doubt, add a letter." I love it.