Thursday, June 19, 2008

Monday's Child

Found out about this poem last night:

Monday's child is fair of face.
Tuesday's child is full of grace.
Wednesday's child is loving and giving.
Thursday's child works hard for a living,
Friday's child is full of woe.
Saturday's child has far to go.
But the child that is born on Sabbath-day
Is bonny and happy and wise and gay.

So you're way better off being born earlier in the week. Generally before Thursday. I can't help but imagine that the weekend was a busy time for midwives and they wanted to discourage mothers from going into labor when they'd rather be kicking back for happy hour and barbeques.

There are two versions of this poem, and either way I am born on Thursday, which means either that I have far to go, or I work hard for a living. Awesome. It reminds me of the tragic movie "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants," which may or may not have made me cry three times. After America Ferrera confronts her father for abandoning her, the camera pans to the children's leukemia ward and I just wept "Oh NO!"
My point is, that meanwhile, Rory is falling in love with a hottie in Greece! Her summer is so much better than the others, I just don't get it. When she leaves, the entire town comes out to say goodbye, and they send her down the mountainside on a donkey procession, with the glimmering blue sea behind her. Clearly a Sabbath-day's child.

Check back later when I rewrite this poem. I think I'll include something like "She works hard for the money," so I can at least be pictured with a sweatshirt off my shoulders.

Monday, June 09, 2008

This is an office

And I say that with pride and tons of awe, as I report that...

Today our new intern arrived. With her DOG. She is not blind. Nor is this dog the kind you put in your purse and feed sweetmeats to. Its the kind that sniffs your butt for drugs at the airport.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

The Intraweb

When I forward something to my boss, she doesn't reply to the person who sent the original. She replies to me as if I were them.

My dad recently signed up to get back in touch with all his old high school classmates.

Last night we had a certain television star at a certain Cuban breakfast joint where I work. He asked the owner if she speaks Cuban. That doesn't have to do with the intraweb. Or does it?

And that is our lesson for today, folks. The internet is for everyone.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Busy Month at the Casa

Well the holidays are over, here are the things I learned:

1. My aunt falls asleep anytime she's in a seat in a dark theater. She even fell asleep in Stomp!
2. Windshield wipers are very fragile. And necessary. In blizzards.
3. If you see a newyear's party through the window outside and it looks like five people standing swaying gently in the middle of an empty room, cut and RUN. (even if the doorbell has already been rung.)
4. It is now called "Carson's countdown." Oh and I don't know any popular "bands."
5. Being 27 is like being 26, except WAY OLDER.
6. Babies like mirrors.
7. If you get too much chocolate, put it all in a wooden trunk so you forget about it for awhile. Then pull it out after dinner when you have guests over.
8. How to make napkin ears
9. The Holidaze are actually like three weeks long.
10. Spill the wine waitresses have heard the joke.
11. Michigan has some very racist names for cookies.
12. Detroit is the rape capital of the world.
13. Michigan is known for its scrapbooking conventions.
14. The suburbs of Chicago are worse than the suburbs of other places for the following reasons: The people, the restaurants, and the highway webs of torture. Oh and the tolls.
15. If you are playing a masked character and your mask falls off, it is acceptable to use the tongue to push it back on.
16. There is at least one person out there who will lie to get a discount, and would like a refund of $6 on December 26, smack dab in the middle of the season of giving.
17. Doggie poops stay here. The frozen drifts keep them cold. Snow will melt away. A haiku!